Bugolgi Apparatus

ideas invade me   ideas captivate me   I wrestle with them   then they leave me   not completely   secretly becoming   a part of me   until I can’t remember being different   you cling to them   I reject you because   I don’t have your connection   to them   I make them my own   and you get irritated   you take a new position   and then I’m frustrated   and cite irreconcilable   differences while the devil just farts   in our general direction  

  Talking the election with my dentist   the pain is real   now he can’t reproduce it   cavity was the big one   they’d already filled it he told me when   he became a citizen   took a pledge not   to be a communist   And he mentioned Khomeini   And how the promises reminded him And how he ignores the rhetoric   All the bashing of Muslims I talk with people   I don’t agree with I try to understand   why do they think this There are reasons   histories and emotions   That in the sunlight   hurt a bit less And I was spitting out   the blood and mouthwash I felt thankful we could   have the discussion   he suggested antibiotics   I took them and then I voted for the communist   who was just a 70’s moderate   he wondered what happened   to all the moderates   he feared the disappointments   of the last mayor  

  Upstairs   I’m not trying to do this   I’m really not   I was opening my eyes   not my mouth   and the observations   just come out   you get kicked upstairs   a lot   with these thoughts   I don’t even think   they’re mine   to be honest   maybe I’ve been here   too many times   I’d like to think   I’ve gotten the hang of things   but these surprises   always throw me off   maybe it was a secret wish   I made be careful of those   you might not want what you want   when you think about it do you think about it?  

took the picture   read the book   saw myself in film   lost myself in moods   just to get used to it   for when it happens again   maybe I could turn it   into something else You know how it is   what it could give   the promise and   chances missed   with the rest   of your time   with that sticky line   you could purify your life I think of you often   without remembering   there’s just a feeling   bittersweet   beyond the wheeling   and the dealing   there was a harmony   at times hard to hear You know how it is   potentials missed Teasing us with   Eternity  

  Watch Me

  Ain’t no place like America today   I’m empty   are you empty   I want to share my emptiness   with you   we could fill each other with these feelings   we could fill each other with emptiness   until we feel full   I could move things around   so could you   we could change some colors   and the mood   until that emptiness   was the color of the new   and then maybe   we would be too tired   and that we would decide   to be good