Blood of another kind
I ate everything you said
I bought what you made
you became a voice in my head
I followed to a point
there’s an emptiness ahead
pain in the back
I take the vow to become
everything myself
we’re blood of another kind
flowing through like minds
suddenly destiny’s not so abstract
with decades barking in the back
blood of another kind
it’s something I realized
you can’t afford to look down
the vertigo will do you in
Interpretation
Try it on how it suits you
make the words your own
feel how it moves you
it’s all open now
to interpretation
this could be you
not as I know you
but something new
get lost in a name
as it whispers to you
you won’t be the same
through these fields of view
you could ruin years
afraid of what you don’t know
crying tears over something
you never had before
you could turn the page
or throw the book out
we speak a new language
together every time we talk
dreams bend with experiences
we grow by listening deep
to the music hearts are make
what it means to you and me
Nothing as sounds surround me
nothing I read into flashing
nothing as heart’s pounding
nothing as I take medicine
nothing as the world’s burning
nothing as pages turning
nothing as you kiss me
nothing on my own again
a cult is spread through the head
tying loser to loser to loser
vinyl encases private fetishes
unpublished on coffee tables
you had chances; preferring glances
polaroid eighties; Asian models
New York soundtracks in the provinces
enough to make anyone cry and laugh
voice sticking on every syllable
turning the sublime heart-rendering-ly simple
king of every bedroom regret
we worship what we can’t collect
oh my departed friend
we’ll always have the memory
of your mylar-encased vinyl
and CD collection
i’ll always remember you crying
over the obscurity of Jay Alanski
Kill yourself Slowly
kill yourself slowly
over a lifetime
a little every day
just a bit of pain
through years of indecision
agree with everything
always say “fine”
dress appropriately
vote republican, marry white
ignore experts and the science
indulge yourself with little things
socialize frequently
take advice of colleagues
thoughts are tucked away
leaking out occasionally
excuse what you say
always apologize
say, “thanks”
Certainty
craving certainty
you tie your lot
to the past
with a future knot
the moment’s not
welcomed here
armored money
for nightly fears
you do everything right
you marry well
mouthing slogans
you’ve made up yourself
and if and when you
miscalculate
you attack with an authority
that won’t break
certainly there are
more important things
But once you get started
It’s grease on the wheels
as you slowly become
what you fear
you embrace the dark
as one sort of career
Squinting
While I clip my nails
and trim my nose hairs
I think of those
former friends from war zones
how uncomfortable they were
we couldn’t have a civil conversation
without an attack
on my girlfriend’s perfume
it was too easy to kill the vibe
polite society requires
everything said a provocation
circling back to unspoken traumas
the effort to squint and enjoy the
band of happiness we were attempting
demanded too large of a leap of faith
from persons whose faith was shattered
